I'm walking alone in the land of Hyrule
I hear Gannondorf has been actin' a fool
And it's up to me to bring peace to the land
With the Master Sword aloft in my hand
I'm four feet tall, dressed in green
I'm the baddest little elf that you've ever seen
And all the sucker NPCs thinkin' they can hang
Are gonna get knocked out by my boomerang
Don't step to me, you'd better let me pass
I'm comin' correct y'all, with style and class
Gonna save the princess and get the glory
And when I get done, they're gonna name the story...
The Legend of Link, 'cause I'm here to say
That Gannondorf is gonna have a bad day
'Cause I'm doin' the hero thing - doin' it right
Gonna bring that righteous Triforce noise tonight
'Cause a hero does what a hero do
Nobody else around here seems to have a clue
So they call me up, in their hour of need
A big bad white knight on a shining steed
A hero does what a hero say
So listen up, y'all, I'm here to save the day
This is my big entrance: my debut
I'm a hero, baby. And this is what a hero do
In a land besieged by the forces of night
One bad mother-hubbard's taken up the fight
And with Buffy Summers nowhere to be found
It's a damn good thing Simon Belmont's around
Gonna Whip It like Devo, all across the scene
I'm a bad-ass vampire-killin' machine
The undead tremble when I bring the pain
You want a taste, son? Come suck on *this* vein
You can hide in the dark, but to no avail
I'm like Vlad Tsepesh; I'm just here to impale
Jack Crow was an amateur, compared to me
You'll be Dead by Dawn, that's a guarantee
Bring your Ghosts and Goblins, your Ghouls and Ghosts
Bring the bats and the rats and the corpsey host
I'm the meanest mother-hubbard monster-slayer around
And I'ma put you six feet back down in the ground
'Cause a hero does what a hero do
Nobody else around here seems to have a clue
So they call me up, in their hour of need
A big bad white knight on a shining steed
A hero does what a hero say
So listen up, y'all, I'm here to save the day
This is my big entrance: my debut
I'm a hero, baby. And this is what a hero do
If there's one thing pirates fear more than hangin'
You know it's Capitan LeChuck and his skeleton gang
They hold the Isle of Mêlée in thrall
It's up to one young wannabe to answer the call
With a white silk shirt and a ponytail
My name's Guybrush Threepwood and I'm gonna set sail
With a master of swords and a petty-crook
And a guy with a talking tattoo and a hook
If you think Guybrush is a stupid name
Go on and blame Tim Shafer, he designed the game***
But I ain't gonna give up. I ain't gonna quit
And the only thing sharper than my sword's my wit
Gonna teach Chuck a lesson, gonna show him how
You say I fight like a farmer? Bitch, you fight like a cow
Gonna rescue Elaine, bring her back just fine
Represent that hero chorus one more time
'Cause a hero does what a hero do
Nobody else around here seems to have a clue
So they call me up, in their hour of need
A big bad white knight on a shining steed
A hero does what a hero say
So listen up, y'all, I'm here to save the day
This is my big entrance: my debut
I'm a hero, baby. And this is what a hero do
*** to be altogether honest, Tim Shafer co-wrote, along with Dave Grossman
Ron Gilbert was the lead-designer and lead-writer on Secret of Monkey Island
But all three are awesome guys.
Also, Steve Purcell (of Sam & Max fame) was responsible for "Guybrush".
He made the sprites for the unnamed, unlikely-protagonist "Guy".
He then appended "brush", to denote that it was a particular kind of file in his paint program.
After a while, the character within "Guybrush.bbm" became Guybrush.
The more you know.
credits
from For The Record,
released April 3, 2012
Lead Vox & Rhythm Guitar: Alex James
Backup Vox & Lead Guitar: Sean May
Nerds With Guitars is the unholy love child borne from the dangerously fertile collective womb of tech-nerd / guitar wizard
"Guitar" Sean May, and lit-nerd / geek-chic frontman Alex James.
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